Monday, June 20, 2011
FWB - Friends With Benefits!
Can a girl and a guy have a no strings attached/friends with benefits relationship without one or the other falling in love?!
For me, I am torn on this subject.
I think it can happen, as long as both partners understand that it is not a "normal" relationship. It needs to be fun and easy. No commitments. No pressures. It cannot happen often! I think the reason why FWB relationships don’t last is because some "couples" enjoy the sex, and do it too often, therefore confusing at least one party in the relationship into lust/love.
On the other hand, it sounds great in theory, but is it really possible to have a "successful" FWB relationship? Men and women are different when it comes to sex. A man is physically designed to have sex with no strings attached. A woman is designed to have sex selectively, which means she cannot have sex and detach — thanks to a little hormone called oxytocin (men have this hormone also, women are just more affected by it). This is the "bonding" hormone that makes the woman want to cuddle, connect emotionally, and communicate about the relationship. The female brain needs to talk about relationships like the male brain needs sex.
Personally, I think the whole FWB thing has become a lot more common and known in recent years. Tools like online dating have lead us to believe that the perfect person is just a check box away, so our expectations have increased as we have lost our ability to compromise. So with this, it is easier to find a friend or aquaintance for a FWB relationship.
Ok, so lets weigh up the pro's and cons of a No strings/Friends with Benefits relationship..
* Sex (and probably lots of it)
* Potential future partner
* One party falling in love
* No real feelings
I want to see this kind of relationship work. It didn't work for Blair and Chuck in Gossip girl, or Emma and Adam in No Strings Attached.. So will it work for me?
I love to really get into my blogs and find out the truth. So I am going to experiment with this. I am going to find a guy, and tell him a FWB relationship is all I want and see what happens.. watch this space!!
If you have any questions, you can email me - firstname.lastname@example.org, twitter @LittleMissVak
at 6:34 AM